ROAD TRIP - Part 6

... So I got up on the "stage" and took her guitar and mic. It was a Takamine guitar - some people like them, but I'm partial to my Martin of course, and it had no guitar strap. Now, for most of you, this would present no problem, but as I am a bit on the horizontally challenged side, well, half of my effort and energy spent on stage was used holding this guitar from sliding off my leg onto the floor. That would have been bad. I mean, here I am, taking HER stage, and then dropping her nice guitar on the floor. Sweet, yeah? Anyway...

Well, I opened with a couple of Jack Johnson and Ben Harper tunes and a Beatle's Blackbird to boot, and much to my surprise, the audience there really seemed to enjoy them. In fact, a few couples actually got up and danced, and there was good, solid applause after each song. "This hardly ever happens back in Virginia, " I thought to myself, ".. then again, we ARE talking about Richmond, after all." Even the girl, whose gig it was, seemed impressed. I can hardly blame her.

See, I've played a number of gigs, and I've had all sorts come up and ask me if they could play a tune or two, and generally, I say "no" - usually they are very drunk and, sorry, I'm not going to hand over my expensive, cherished gift of a guitar for you to drop and break, just to satisfy your rock and roll fantasy, mmkay? So I understand the concerns she likely had with letting me up there at HER gig and playing HER guitar. I'm pretty certain that at least part of her expression upon hearing me play was simply relief - relief that I actually did have at least a tiny clue as to what I was doing.

Now then. it was after those first few tunes that my previous conversation (as seen in Part 5, available online NOW) with the young fellows at the nearby table came into play.

"GIVE US SOME 'D' !!! " they shouted.

The table across from those 2 boys was filled with another group of Marine supporters - I could tell by all the red they were wearing in support of the 1st Battalion. Most of them were in their 20's and they joined in the chorus call for some Tenacious D... "Yeah, Tenacious D!!! Play some 'D' !!"

Now, having already gotten in trouble playing some of my... umm, how shall I say it, less than politically correct and polite music, discretion reared its faithful head and responded. "Umm, well, that probably wouldn't be a good idea. I dont' want to offend anyone and that's some very, VERY risque stuff."

Naturally, this immediately resulted in much hooting and hollering. "YEAH! Give it to us! The 'D' "

"Come on, now," I pleaded with them. "The song I usually play of theirs start with an 'F' and rhymes with 'truck'... I can't play it unless I have been given permission." I mean, the last thing I wanted to do while in South Carolina, a state that still has some very severe BLUE LAWS, was to get arrested and carted off. I was just down there to watch some boys graduate from the Marine Corps, you know? It just wouldn't do to be stuck in a slammer for a long weekend, would it? I mean, they DON'T PLAY down there. They had signs posted in construction zones down there that stated, "Speeding in Work Zones = $500 and 30 days"

In case you misread that:

$500 and 30 days

So they don't just smack you on the hands.

But the crowd was VERY insistent.

So insistent, in fact, that they 2 of my party, the girl whose gig it was, the waitresses ( one of whom happened to be the owner's daughter) all went around and asked each and everybody there if they would be offended if I sang a song with offensive language and sex in it....

and then... Part 7